Saturday, August 12, 2006

Life Skills...

With all the idiocy going on everywhere in the country. The Moroor* Slacking off, the Ministry of Housing making people wait for 25,000 years to get a shithole of a house or a BD40k Loan that won't even buy them a land the size of a 1-inch square tile and the Ministry of Information blocking sites, or even worse, Google Earth. What the hell is this country coming to?

What made me laugh real hard was reading about new curriculums for school students approved by the dinosaurish Ministry of Education in Akhbar-Alkhaleej (credit due to them for publishing hilarious articles!). One of these curriculums is about “Life Skills”. It’s about time you idiots, but why now? And what on earth are you going to teach those students? Life Skills my ass.

Apparently, this will teach them on how to deal with people or situations that arise on a day-to-day basis. You want them to learn about real life situations? Then take them on field trips to service-oriented ministries or departments such as the Traffic Directorate, Immigration & Passports and Health Centers (+ Salmaniya Hospital) etc... There they will learn how to kiss ass to get what they want, otherwise they would rot in long queues until their legs go numb or collapse due to their asses not being able to withstand the pressure of standing for 7 hours. Instead of taking them on field trips to Adhari Park or El7adeeqa Elmaa2eyya** year after year after year, just take them to those ministries and give them real life exercises on how to deal with different situations. And award the ones who achieve their goals with accolades such as “Ass-kisser of the Year” or “Cocksucker of the Month”. I can give you a few suggestions on where to take them and scenarios of how to deal with situations. This will be also dependent on how advanced they will get in these courses. With high performers taken into more blood-boiling pressure-rising employee-slacking government entities.

This will be a sort of a "Bahrain survival guide" right? I mean you could teach kids how to evade doing any work at a workplace and yet still get credit for it... You can learn that from any government sector employee… Even with some "private" sector or "semi-government entities" on how to piss off an honest customer who has a small deposit to make (teacher required: any NBB teller, Fuckers!!!)... That process shouldn’t take more than 5 minutes! Yet somehow, they manage to keep you waiting for an hour next to a guy with a serious B.O. problem (I’ll leave this for another libbie ;P). Kids will have to be taught how to make an accident look like it's the other guy’s fault EVEN THOUGH it’s actually his own fault... Knowing moroor* officers is essential here...

What’s that son? You want to be a moqawil*** when you grow up and get loads of Indians cheap and don’t know where to put them? Easy... Learn from that dumbass that put 200 odd HUMAN BEINGS and stuck them in a building that cant take more than 15 and -get this- it's made of WOOD, fucking blaiwit****! Problem solved... till a disaster occurs and you get your ass harassed by human rights activists... Oh yeah and eventually the government AFTER they have covered your sorry ass up and people KNOW that they have been covering your shitty ass due to 1) Corruption, 2) Bribery or 3) Parternship!

Our kids are our future... And judging from the looks of the primary school children, I feel nothing but dread from trying to imagine how these morons are going to take over the country from us... Let’s just kill the dumb ones and leave the intelligent! But… Then again, the population of Bahrain will dwindle down to like, what, 237 only? SWEET!

Now, where on God's green earth is that baseball bat? I am afraid that the Customs Department saw that article and decided to BAN EVERY SINGLE BASEBALL BAT that is about to enter Bahrain! Fucking cheap-ass labor. And they say poor Indians or Bangalis***** are cheap labor. The government employees are "cheap" labour, cheap in quality, that is. Because they tend to punish ALL for a fuckup of one person whom they originally backed up! What gives?

* Traffic Police
** Water Garden in Salmaniya
*** Contractor
**** Plywood
***** Bangladeshians

21 Comments:

Anonymous mamameya said...

Hi guys

tethakeroni ?

9a7 elsankum 3ala al kalam al san3

10:53 PM, August 13, 2006  
Blogger LiB Team said...

Hi mamameya,

How can we forget one of our first and early fans? Thanks for coming back,

and glad you liked it :D

10:21 AM, August 14, 2006  
Blogger do0da said...

LOL , and i thought i had issues with my country.

9:29 PM, August 14, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

btw you sons of bitches, it's not "Bangladeshians".

LFMAO.

You bunch of fags.

9:19 AM, August 15, 2006  
Blogger LiB Team said...

Thanks for the correction LOSER.. do u go around blogs finding spelling mistakes all day? It's sad what a lack of friends can do to a human being... Oh wait I apologize.. I offended human beings by naming you one of us.. Get a life dickweed.

2:03 PM, August 15, 2006  
Blogger Evil Pissed-Off Bahraini said...

First of all, who the fuck cares whether it was Bangladeshians or Bangladeshis or Banglafucks???

I think I can use someone like you as a spelling checker… or wait, I think they call that a secretary, or better yet, Microsoft Word! Dumb fuck.

Oh, and BTW it’s LMFAO not LFMAO you RETARDED MORON!!!!!

KMAYGDBAFF!!!!

(Incase you were wondering, that’s short for kiss my ass you god damn bitch ass fucking fag!!!)

Eat shit and DIE.

2:51 PM, August 15, 2006  
Anonymous LiB Team Member said...

LoooooL anonymous, you got owned biatch!

7:33 AM, August 16, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You and boilerman superhero must be friends, right?

1:51 PM, August 16, 2006  
Blogger LiB Team said...

well anon, thanks to you, we are now :D

7:41 AM, August 17, 2006  
Anonymous lizardo said...

somehow its my first time bein here .
cool writings and yes real stuff from real inside .

if u have a fan list plz just let me know ..

5:21 AM, August 18, 2006  
Blogger Cece DeSouza said...

A fan list?

11:36 PM, August 19, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

you know guys, instead of bitchin', why don't you go spank the lizard? int that what you recommend? its summer and you're bored -stiff-, no? are you like rich daddy kids with beemers and benzes and all these fancy cars in your oil rich country? how about coming to neighboring iraq for a change? maybe that'll make men out of you?

9:17 AM, August 22, 2006  
Anonymous LiB Team Member said...

anon..

1. Spanking the lizzard will get hippie animal cruelty activists on our asses and we really cant be bothered
2. If you read our previous blog Brats you will know that one of our many pet peeves is punk ass rich kids, so our reply to ur accusation about us being that is: ur gay
3. U'd have to be either suicidal or really stupid to go to iraq right now, and there r much simpler methods of proving our manhood. But we wont give u that pleasure as we r assuming u r a dirty pervert (hence why u r fantisizing about us being rich little boys.. oh my god r u michael jackson???).
4. We write what we write bcoz this is what this blog is for. If you dont like it, keep ur comments in ur ass and go read somewhere else.

dickweed.

1:51 PM, August 22, 2006  
Anonymous lizardo said...

and please keep the lizard away from u .. ishda5lha maskeena fee elsalfa !!?

9:30 PM, August 22, 2006  
Blogger Evil Pissed-Off Bahraini said...

errrr lizardo, theyre not talkin about a real lizard...they are talking about polishin the trophy... spankin the monkey... errupting the volcano... choking the anaconda... wrestling the one eyed monster... pumpin the jiz fountain... shakin hands with the president... changing your oil... fighting the purple headed demon... jerkin off...





ok if your that dence... theyre talkin about masturbating...

1:03 PM, August 25, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is this blog really made by a Bahraini? What's the with all the anti-Islam comments... Sheez, you khalejee people (excluding saudis/yemenis/omanis) really need a beating.

7:42 PM, September 06, 2006  
Blogger LiB Team said...

WTF? When we talk about Islam, they label us extremists, and when we don't talk about Islam, they say we're atheists? Get a grip and get your head out of your fucking ass you motherfucking ass licking hippie.

7:27 AM, September 07, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

...Nobody call the morons in gulf countries who feed KFC everyday to American troops to kill Arabs/Muslims "Exteremists". Do you know the Americans laugh at you when you shower them with your million dollar gifts? They go: Look at these sand nigger, we kill them and they give us money, cars, hotels, everything.

I really can't till "Fath al-Khaleej". Then we'll see who's the boss.

5:08 AM, September 09, 2006  
Anonymous LiB team member said...

anon.. u have a dispute saying we have ant-islam comments.. point them out and i'll try my best to get it into ur thick skull how it is NOT anti-islam.. we r muslims and r true to our faith and we never posted anything anti-islamic.. btw r u osama bin laden? ehy everybody, Osama bin Laden reads our blog!!

listen Osama, we tend not to delve into politics.. and whether or not we go to kfc for a meal is none of your concern.. if you think not going to kfc helps ur "cause" then do it and write a blog about it.. our cause is different.. our readers know what our topics are.. and you have all the right not to come back if you dont like what we write about and to be honest, we'd love it if u'd think about using that right..

dickweed..

12:40 PM, September 10, 2006  
Anonymous LOVES LIB said...

Keep up the good work guys! Please do write something about the Kuwaiti and Saudi faggots who cluttered Seef mall this eid!

As for this anonymous guy... GET A FUKINN LIFE U CREATURE!

1:25 PM, October 31, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

oh yes LIB team
you are the best, keep it coming
just keep it comin'
and about that ass anon..I think he might be "Hini" or "Bangladishi"..so f@#$ off retard.

4:38 PM, April 04, 2007  

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