Wednesday, February 21, 2007

It’s Good to be Back... Or is it?‎

Well First of all I apologize for not being able to write for a while. We had a hiatus and then I went to the UK on a leisure trip. Yes in the bloody freezing winter! But it was really great and I enjoyed it. It was good to be back to see that the country is the same as it was when I left it as a student some 8 years back. It’s not like Dubai where if you go every 2 months, you don’t recognize it. Dubai is like Nancy Ajram, fakely beautiful.

Of course when I came back, I got pissed off immediately because there, in the UK, they respect you for who you are, even if they give you that “you are an Arab terrorist” look, they might make you take your clothes off for inspection, all that is still overruled by their codes of ethics and behaviors. At least you still are treated equally with the rest of the people.

What pissed me off? Okay, first it was fucking Gulf Air. No no no it wasn’t the delay. For one of the rarest moment in their fucked up history, the bloody plane was actually on time! It was one of their flight attendants. Whatever happened to the term “steward”? Is it so demeaning that they replaced it with this “politically correct” bullshit term? Hell if there was a term more demeaning than steward I would have used it to describe this piece of inbred shit who was supposedly to serve me with a smile. Here is what happened, well let me start from their staff at fucking Heathrow Airport:

At check-in they assigned me a different seat from my wife, and get this, the plane had 100 EMPTY seats! Seriously, are you guys high or something? You have 100 empty seats and still you manage to assign me and my wife seats apart from each other? Nice work, dumbasses. I asked the lady nicely if the first row economy seats were taken or not, she checked and told me that they are not taken, great! Gimme those seats! She said gladly and tried to allocate the seats for us, but couldn’t. She said that they were “blocked” or something and that sometimes such seats are blocked until the very last moment and then if they are not assigned to someone who pre-booked them or something then they would be available. She told me that she will be at the gate at the time of boarding and that I have to remind her so she gives me those seats. Great! Lovely! I was impressed by that nice promise with a smile and thought “Maybe Gulf Air are not that evil after all!”. Anyways, we went through all that bullshit security measures of LHR and all that, where they confiscated a bottle of contact lenses solution which belonged to my wife, claiming it was “too big to carry on the plane”, WHAT? What the hell was that for? How is she supposed to keep her eyes from drying up? Suck my dick, asswipes.

We went to the gate and sat there waiting to board. At the time we were required to hand in our boarding passes and the lady wasn’t there. So I explained the situation to the guy who was there at the desk and how I was supposed to get those seats. This is where he went all-knowing and decided to talk out of his ass and crap out of his mouth. All that just because I greeted him in Bahraini as clearly he was Bahraini too and decided he wanted to show me how he can tell me to go fuck myself in an indirect way, which he did basically, the cocksucker. He started raving about how these seats are not allocated at all to anyone and that since this plane had over 100 seats empty these are already booked for emergencies and watchacallit blah blah blah and how they use something called “trimming”. What is this, a fucking barber shop? I still went “fair enough” but to my shock I discovered that these seats were given to two English fuckers. And how do I know they weren’t pre-booked? Cuz I asked them and they said that it was given to them at the gate. Nice going Gulf Air fuckers. So this is how you treat a fellow Bahraini who just wants those seats as long as they’re not someone else’s? I guess Gulf Air as always and always will be white and blond worshippers.

With that out of the way and I decided to leave it in the past cuz Gulf Air will never learn and never change no matter what. Take British Airways for example, where I took a local flight from London to Glasgow and then back a few days later. Boy how they treat a human being with respect and make him feel like a human being. Unlike those Gulf Air fuckers. I know it’s good to show people that you are a hospitable species n shit like that but treat everyone EQUALLY… Don’t over do it for others just because they were the “masters” at one point of time, oops sorry they are still the masters I guess.

We took our shitty seats which even 7-year-olds wouldn’t be comfortable in and sat like the normal couple we are. My wife found out that her seat was a bit tilted back and she tried pressing the button to bring it back to the upright position but it didn’t work, another nice going, assholes, your seats don’t work and your fucking planes aren’t properly maintained, all you’re good at is how to treat the business and first class cabins like royalty while others should be thankful that they even are flying with you losers. Now it’s normal to treat other cabins differently but take Emirates for example, fly their flights on economy and tell me how they treat a person. Anyways there were a couple of British WHORES (yes they ARE whores cuz they never shut up about how they were going to have fun in Dubai and what a shithole Bahrain was). I know my country isn’t as impressive as the Nancy Ajramic Dubai but it’s my home and I know what kind of good and smart and hardworking people live in it, unlike the dumb Bedouins and scores of expatriates that infest that hellhole. Oh and they kept on raving about Kevin’s kiss or Roger’s nice one-nighter. Tell me they are not fucking whores. So this bitch that was behind my wife told her to take her seat to the upright position and we nicely explained that we couldn’t. Before I realized it she had called the whore stewardess who was flirting with a young Bahraini guy who kept talking to her about that night they had in BJs n shit, NO I AM NOT MAKING THIS SHIT UP! The stewardess also tried to bring the seat back up but couldn’t and the English ho’ acted she was all enraged and upset. WHAT THE FUCK DID WE DO TO YOU SKANK? She told her that the seat isn’t working and then looked at us and said we had to change the seat. WHAT THE FUCK? Why us? My wife said she will never change her seat and I told her to basically go shove a dildo up her ass (in a nice way of course!). That skanky ho behind us kept puffing and kicking our chair until another stewardess came and told her that they will change them. Damn right, it wasn’t us who will be changing our places, not after you denied me the seats that were not assigned to anyone. I told them that we weren’t changing our place after what their inefficient ground staff did to me and even if it were against IATA regulations I wouldn’t change. Then they called a third stewardess who somehow resolved it and the seat actually went back to its place. A few minutes later I saw their head-asshole steward. A fucking bald asshole with little hair that is white, isn’t it about time you kicked these dinosaurs out? Why am I being so harsh about him? Cuz here’s what happened next… He came and asked about “the nervous girl” and the bitch stewardess pointed at the skanky ho behind us. Come on, what about me? Was I not shouting at them? Didn’t I have needs and was mistreated? He slipped something into her hands (must have been a dildo or a vibrator) and told her how sorry they were. WHAT THE FUCK? Oh by the way, the fucker looks like a damn meenawee*, most probably IS meenawee, bald and has white hair, most likely the service manager of the economy class cabin. If you run into him, make sure you will get the most service out of him cuz he’s one discriminating fucker. And that didn’t end there, he kept on coming every 30 minutes or so and asking her “are you still nervous?” and that pissed me off even more.

That’s why the west will always own us, and by own I mean they will be way ahead of us, not control us cuz that is a well-known fact which I don’t have to even go there. They have a good system and EVERY one abides by the rules, there is no was6a** or bullshit like that. Everyone is disciplined and if you do something wrong, you get punished for it, end of story. And fuck you Gulf Air. This time I am venting it here and not sending an email to your esteemed Chief Executive as last time I did that, all I got was a measly 3000 miles compensation into my frequent flyer mileage while others got business class tickets for two persons n shit like that. Fuck you and Fuck you min galb***.

Other than that, here are a couple of shots from my trip to the Scottish Highlands, Edinburgh and London.

The Highlands (Scotland)
Scottish Highlands

The Highlands (Scotland)
Scottish Highlands

Edinburgh Castle
Edinburgh Castle

A view of the City of Edinburgh from the Castle's cannon point
Edinburgh Castle

Ben Al-Kabeer**** in London
Big Ben

The Eye of London
The London Eye

I came across this article in Akhbar Al-Khaleej today and all I can say is, “duck my sick”, Fahmi.

And what the fuck is this rule about the 900 BD bullshit? So households who make more than 900 BD a month are rich? Oh and you want them to make a purchase application cuz they won’t be entitled for a government house? Oh and there is another rule by the way. If your household income is more than BD 1200 you are NOT entitled to ANY Ministry of Housing services. So let me get this straight, first for those who make more than 900 they have no right whatsoever to have a government home and they should apply for a purchase loan? And if they make more than 1200 they have NO right whatsoever? Oh so those who make 1200 are extremely rich and have no loans, deductions or any other commitments? Before we go there, the loan maximum amount is BD 40,000. What the fuck does that bring you? This BARELY brings you a land the size of a toilet, let alone having a ready-made house with that price. Now, if those who make more than 900 or 1200 BD a month go to banks to get mortgage loans, the first thing they do is not look at the basic salary, they look at the whole shebang, from basic, to deductions and anything else. Then they determine what the amount is. And when you go to the fucking MoH, they tell you that your basic is more than 900 or 1200 a month and that you are not entitled. When you tell them about your deductions, they tell you to fuck off and that they only look at the base salary. So if I go to these incompetent bastards, they won’t give me anything cuz I am “rich” in their eyes. And if I go to the bank, they tell me to go shove a baseball bat up my ass cuz after deductions, nothing is left from my salary and another idiot organization, the BMA, has issued a rule of that no one’s deductions should exceed 50% of his monthly salary. This is how Bahraini officials always fix problems. So a fucker takes out loans to play and travel and buy a shitty car to load it with shitloads of utter crap which in the end turns out more expensive than a Mercedes or a Beamer, then he realizes he can’t make any payments cuz his salary doesn’t cover shit but the banks give him lonas and extensions anyways so they suck him and other Bahrainis dry, be them needy or not. So after all that the BMA comes and punishes EVERY one by making this rule which won’t allow people to take out other sorts of loans such as housing loans n shit like that. This whole country is going downhill.

This is bad, is it my fault to be born in such a generation that unless I am born into a family who will shove a golden spoon up my ass, I can’t buy even a small piece of land to build a tiny house to keep me an my family safe? But my pay is good enough to make me stay at an apartment which even recently went up in rent value due to exploiting sons of bitches? So that way, the rich gets richer and the poor gets poorer, no more middle class. There is a lot of shit that’s going on in this regards that even thinking about it makes me so angry and can’t do anything about it. So just read the article and smile, for you live in Bahrain. See, all of this is interlinked, the banks, the BMA, the MoH and others are conspiring to deny a lot of people their right to a basic house. I am not asking for a fucking palace, but I also don’t want your government housing so you can make me live next to shitty Syrians and Baathists? I make good money, I should be given a good amount to be able to either build a decent home or get a ready made decent house. And what’s with lands? They say there is a shortage in lands while clearly there isn’t just look at Google Earth (God bless them for that genius piece of software!) and see for yourself. The MoH tells you that if you need a land grant, go to the Royal Court, nice, so I go to the RC and they tell me to check with the MoH. Oh so you fancy a game of ping pong or tennis don’t you? But then someone else tells me to go shove my own dick into my own ass, cuz that will be more possible than getting a land. Then I come to know that someone else got a land cuz, even with the waas6az I use, his was stronger and although he already has a few properties here n there, he doesn’t like where they are and wants something closer to his parents. And just look at the empty lands in Hamad Town which haven’t been built in 20 years although the neighborhood is filled up. What the fuck is this? I didn’t come and ask you to make me a property tycoon, all I want is a piece of land so I build my own damn fucking house you flesh-eating fuckers.

* Meenawee: A Persian person whose origins are from the town of "Meenaw" or "Minab" in Farsi, usually dark-skinned.
** Was6a = wasta = To use your influence and/or contacts to get shit done
*** Min Galb: From deep in my heart
**** Ben Al-Kabeer: Big Ben :P


Anonymous manoomaa said...

Teslaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaam yadek 3ala hal maqal al to7faa :)

3:29 PM, February 21, 2007  
Blogger Evil Pissed-Off Bahraini said...

damn man... i feel you...

i can soooo feel the rage...

my eyes went red from staring at the screen... or was it because blood just rushed though my head from the inner rage?...

awesome... pure awesomeness

5:30 PM, February 21, 2007  
Blogger ..G.. said...

WElcome back LIB :D

and what a great come back, I guess you needed to let that all out.. it couldn't have been said any better :)

loved the pics from scotland.. i miss it so much :(

7:12 PM, February 21, 2007  
Anonymous Elisabeth said...

Welcome back!! I really missed you...What a good laugh I got from you tonight!!

Glad I found you through Sous.

12:28 AM, February 22, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

did you mention that economy class passengers are ONLY entitled to 20kgs, and if they are a member of their frequent flier program they get 10 extra kilos, while in al-Etihad if im not mistaken economy passengers are entitled to 30 KILOS without any membership .... it would be really nice if GF increase the number of restrooms 'oo ent bkrama' in the economy cabin ..... i mean 4 restrooms for 200 passengers, while in the Business its 2 for 36? MoH la ta3leeq mn 9jhom ?

3:57 AM, February 22, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

very nice article. i, too, have despised gulf air for many years now and have made a promise not to ever fly with them again. sure enough, i havent even considered gulf air when flying these past 6 years or so.

5:45 AM, February 22, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

firstly NVR USE FUCKIN GULF AIR :O thats the biggest mistake u can do use brit airways or klm(i preffer klm cause i use it every yr to go with my family to europe). second wat u say bout the lands is true i especially liked the "fancy a game of ping pong"LOL an ya i know wat u mean bout lands i mean look at the fuckin skhier:O an all the so called "shieks" r taken all the lands did u c the ones on the way to madenat hammad they can build like 40 houses in side that mother fuckin property of sum fuck who got feed by a golden spoon as u said.

we wanted to buy a small land that can fit only 2 cars near our house and after wastin alot of fuckin time goin to the moh an to the royal court an all that shit for 3 yrs an wastin a shitload of cash they said it costs bd900 wtf:O it can only fit 2 cars on it:O u cant even build a room on it we needed it to expand our garden only:O.

gud luck findin a house or land.

10:38 PM, February 23, 2007  
Anonymous Sous said...

Great to have you back! I'm sorry about Gulf Air being asses, still your post cracked me up (sorry). I was reading a travel brochure from Gulf Air yesterday and it said that economy seats are splendid and blabla soo good and it made me think of this post. They sound really sucky judging by your experience. Loved the pictures you posted. Haven't been to the UK since I moved from there in 2000 and I miss it a lot. Hope you hade the bestest time there.


2:41 PM, February 25, 2007  
Blogger Ammar456 said...

Great! Finally we get to see someone with actual writing skills that represent something more than a 3rd grader, more profanity than a snoop dogg track, and more sense than ahmedi nejad, discussing our bahraini issues. well done, two thumbs up; I will definately keep a look out for your posts bro!

Ammar's Blog

1:00 PM, February 26, 2007  
Blogger Amjad said...

interesting ...

Welcome back ..

11:43 PM, February 26, 2007  
Anonymous Vince said...

I just feel you're filling up your blog but that you had nothing to say...
The posts you used to do were hilarious. This one is shitty.
I feel like you're a kid waiting for the government to give you 2000km² of land for 10 bds, and having business class trips for free. You know what? All the fucking flights i've done with klm, air france, brit airways or qatar airways are the same as gulf air... And yeah, business have more luxury; probably because they pay 4 times the price of your ticket.
Why don't you cry as well about the price of the rolls-royce (waaaa, it's more expensive than a fucking toyota echo); or the size of your dick (waaaa, it's too small)?
This post is the worse i've ever seen. To sum up, you're complaining about:
-Security issues in England (it's not like they're not warning you...)
-You did not have the first row of seats in the plane
-The steward did not spend 30 minutes of his time speaking with you
-The government does not give you more than 40kBD
-That 40kbd is not enough (do you know you can buy a fucking flat in new york for this price?)
-That you spend your whole salary in reimbursing your car/renting a flat/paying thai prostitutes, and that you can't take a loan from the banks because of this.
-That your landlord is an "exploiting son of bitch"

Stay in your fucking cheap world... Do you know that in england (that you admire so much), to get something, you have to get your hands out of your ass?

1:54 PM, February 28, 2007  
Blogger LiB Team said...

Manoomaa: Thanks alot, glad you liked it :D

EPB: Thanks man, and unleash your rage on the Vince retard below!

G: Thanks, you too have to go back to Scotland one day.

Elisabeth: Thanks, glad you had a laugh, hopefully there will be plenty more where that came from!

Anon: I know! But try to explain it to blind people like the Vincy retard below!

Anon #2: Gulf Air are the worst of the worst.

Anon #3: Thanks! And regarding lands and property, let someone idiotic like the fucking drone Vince understand such things!

sous: Glad to have you here! And thanks. Yeah right, splendid seats indeed.

Ammar: Thanks bro, good to have you with us bro!

Amjad: Thanks man!

Okay Vince: you’re probably a retarded mongrel. It’s okay, I forgive you. Since you are a ‎retard, I will be nice with you…‎

‎-‎ I didn’t ask for the government to give me 2000 sq. km of land. Hell, the whole of ‎Bahrain is only 700 sq. km you retard.‎
‎-‎ Okay fair enough, business class fuckers pay 4 times more than me, it doesn’t ‎mean that they have to get 700 times better service. Emirates treat their business ‎and first class passengers like royalty. But they also treat their economy class ‎passengers with respect and much better treatment than all other airliners that I ‎have been on, and I am talking about Emirates, Gulf Air, British Airways, Flying ‎Colors (yes even flying colors are much better than gulf air in terms of value for ‎money). I didn’t ask to be treated the same as business class, read well you ‎fucking idiot. Plus, this wasn’t the first time I have a shitty experience with them. ‎Maybe because they worship a foreigner like you, you wouldn’t notice it ‎anyways. Asshole.‎
‎-‎ Security issues in England? Okay fair enough. I guess our species made them shit ‎their pants so bad that they tightened security measures, but what’s with the ‎liquids thing? My wife suffered from these drying up contact lenses and she ‎needed that solution, anyways enta mostawaak moo maal waa7ed yeg3ed yeshra7 ‎lak, khaarkosse. Fuck you.‎
‎-‎ I didn’t have front row seats in the plane? Again, I didn’t ask for first class you ‎disphit. I asked for front row ECONOMY seats which were NOT assigned to ‎anyone. But they gave it to a couple of blond fuckers. So that’s okay but it’s not ‎okay for me to get them despite having promised me to get them? And they want ‎me to call them a national carrier, national carrier my ass. Fuck them and you for ‎that matter.‎
‎-‎ The steward did not spend 30 mins with me, but he sure did as heckfire spend 30 ‎mins with the whore with a PMS behind me trying to please her.‎
‎-‎ The government doesn’t give me more than 40k BD? the government doesn’t ‎‎“give” anything, that’s a loan you moron, and if my pay is good, I should be able ‎to get more, that’s the max they can offer which brings us to…‎
‎-‎ A flat in New York for BD 40k, nice! Really impressive. News flash idiot, we’re ‎not in New York, we’re in the desert and go check property prices in Bahrain ‎before you come bashing me here. Asslicking fudge-packing mongrel.‎
‎-‎ I didn’t say I was the one who took loans to play and pay hookers. Although I do ‎have rent and car loan obligations and the pay isn’t high enough for a housing ‎loan to be added somewhere in between. Then again you’re an idiot and don’t ‎understand the way things work here. Sissy ass fucker.‎
‎-‎ Yes my landlord, like you, is a motherfucking cunt who is an inconsiderate ‎retardo.‎
‎-‎ At least in England, everyone is treated equally, even if at least on the surface. ‎Here they treat someone better than you just cuz they or their dads and contacts ‎can and will suck dick to get what they want.‎

Can’t believe how some idiots think…‎

3:02 PM, February 28, 2007  
Anonymous Vince said...

The anger removed your brain.

Let's calculate...
A flat OR reimbursing your house = 500 BD
A car = 200 BD
Eat&misc. = 300 bd

Total 1000 BD

Don't tell me you do not have enough money, unless you're such an idiot that you have any other loan to reimburse. FYI, the average salary in Europe is 600BD, so do not tell me you can't take a loan with a 1200BD salary in Bahrain...

About your HUGE plane dilemma... Liquids are forbidden on planes, you think it's stupid, it's also the rule. You complain cuz saudis don't know the rules; well, you should show some respect about foreign rules as well. I will add something... You are allowed to carry less than 100 millimeters of liquid. So, unless your wife needs 2 liters of water on each eye, i do not see where the problem is. Oh yeah, you did not know it, it was not written on bold letter on your plane tickets... Dumbass.

Your point about the difficulty to get a land is valid. Your point about the 2 bitches sitting on your back is funny. Was6a exists in every arab country, it's sad. The rest... well, cry...

You have to respect english rules in England - cry
The bank do not want to lend you money cuz you took a loan to have a porsche or that you have a full luxury 4 bedrooms flat to pay - cry
The bad bahraini government do not lend you more than 40k - cry
You want to buy a palace but have only 40k to spend (not that you have spare money on your side) - cry
The steward was not nice with you - cry

I'll let you cry...

5:59 PM, February 28, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

in all fairness my friend vince you're not making much sense im sorry

11:11 PM, February 28, 2007  
Blogger LiB Team said...

yeah you're just plain dumb, Vince. Oh hey, can you get me good house in Bahrain for 40k? I would pay YOU another 40k on top of it as a commission you dumbass, in here, lands alone now cost a minimum of BD 8 per sq ft, go do the math, you fucking moron I didn't say I want a palace I think I was so clear about that. Are you high or something? laa o binga7ba haad killshay o emyawwed lee 3ala liquid o liquid, ed3as elliquid fee gadhik yal khaneeth el gawwaad el sarsari.

6:23 AM, March 01, 2007  
Blogger Mariyam said...

Thats a really nice blog, though the language you use can't really be termed as professional. :) I have to however agree with every word you've said about Gulf Air.They just don't treat people they way they ar supposed to.You think they have a bias against Bahrainis?The treatement metted out to those of us who are from the subcontinent is even worse.

Some instances of Gulf Air hospitality:-
#1 On a recent trip to Bahrain the flight was delayed.On asking the GA liason oficer (thats what they are called at Bombay airport), he said that there is some technical problems and it would take atleast another 2 hours for the maintenance crew to make the flight airworthy. He also told me that it will be very cold in Bahrain and the delay is good, coz by the time I reach Bahrain it would be noon time.WHAT KIND OF A REPLY IS THAT?You guys keep your flights at inhuman hours, have us rush to teh airport 3 hours in advance and then delay the flights by atleast 2 hours.Then you give those smart alec replies. Guys like this one should be sacked.

#2 I was making the trip with my niece (5 years old).When we purchased our tickets, we had 17 a and 17 b as our seats. However,the baggage check at Gulf Air gave me sats numbered 17 a and 19 a.I didn't check it then, as I never thought GA would mess up so bad.I realised the goo up when I boarded the flight. As there was a samily sitting on the seats 19 b and c, I couldn't ask them to move. The person next to me was unwilling to change his seat becuase he didn't want to 'break rules'. What teh hell is that? So I approached the head steward.He was old guy,with unkempt hair, most probably the same manager you mentioned. :-). He was kind and cooperative. He said he'll see what he could do. After that he disappeared never to be seen again. He sent a stewardess to sort out teh problem. She came to me and asked me something in rapid arabic. I told her I was as Indian as she was, and didnt speak arabic.Then she says-'tum Indian ho'? ( in a very accusative manner)
'Tum' is very informal/rude and one wouldnt expect a stranger to call you 'tum'.then she kept telling me how it was my fault and not the airlines fault, and how I was to blame blah blah blah. She did nothing to help me. Finally, I managed to get a seat next to my niece, thanks to nice gentlemen seated a row behind my niece.
I don't get this- the stewardes(she was Indian) was so rude.She has a different tone while talking to arabs/whites and a different tone while talking to Indians.Air India is not a great airline, but atleast they treat everyone equally shabbily.

9:41 AM, March 05, 2007  
Anonymous Sous said...

Mariyam, I'm not talking on LibTeams behalf but what do u mean by professional? I didn't know that was what blogging was all about ;).

8:46 PM, March 17, 2007  
Blogger Bijilah said...

I like your rants! Keep 'em coming.

2:37 AM, March 19, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thinking of your post today when found out my wife has chickenpox here is the story. She flew back from bangkok 2 weeks ago on gulf air after vacation she developed what I thought was a bad cold but her cold became worse and she started getting the little red bumps, I asked here if anybody was sick next to her and she told me there was a british couple with two kids one little girl who was very sick covered in red pimples her whole body, the snotty brit mom told my wife she got bit by 100 misquitoes in phuket lying c"nt. Good job gulf air for letting a little girl with a very infectous virus get on your bird.

6:10 PM, April 15, 2007  
Blogger LiB Team said...

Of course they believed that British idiot cuz she's simply British. This is not against any kind of humans, but Gulf Air go too far in respecting certain kind of people over the rest. Pure assholes. Hope your wife a speedy recovery.

10:40 AM, April 17, 2007  

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