Life Skills...
With all the idiocy going on everywhere in the country. The Moroor* Slacking off, the Ministry of Housing making people wait for 25,000 years to get a shithole of a house or a BD40k Loan that won't even buy them a land the size of a 1-inch square tile and the Ministry of Information blocking sites, or even worse, Google Earth. What the hell is this country coming to?
What made me laugh real hard was reading about new curriculums for school students approved by the dinosaurish Ministry of Education in Akhbar-Alkhaleej (credit due to them for publishing hilarious articles!). One of these curriculums is about “Life Skills”. It’s about time you idiots, but why now? And what on earth are you going to teach those students? Life Skills my ass.
Apparently, this will teach them on how to deal with people or situations that arise on a day-to-day basis. You want them to learn about real life situations? Then take them on field trips to service-oriented ministries or departments such as the Traffic Directorate, Immigration & Passports and Health Centers (+ Salmaniya Hospital) etc... There they will learn how to kiss ass to get what they want, otherwise they would rot in long queues until their legs go numb or collapse due to their asses not being able to withstand the pressure of standing for 7 hours. Instead of taking them on field trips to Adhari Park or El7adeeqa Elmaa2eyya** year after year after year, just take them to those ministries and give them real life exercises on how to deal with different situations. And award the ones who achieve their goals with accolades such as “Ass-kisser of the Year” or “Cocksucker of the Month”. I can give you a few suggestions on where to take them and scenarios of how to deal with situations. This will be also dependent on how advanced they will get in these courses. With high performers taken into more blood-boiling pressure-rising employee-slacking government entities.
This will be a sort of a "Bahrain survival guide" right? I mean you could teach kids how to evade doing any work at a workplace and yet still get credit for it... You can learn that from any government sector employee… Even with some "private" sector or "semi-government entities" on how to piss off an honest customer who has a small deposit to make (teacher required: any NBB teller, Fuckers!!!)... That process shouldn’t take more than 5 minutes! Yet somehow, they manage to keep you waiting for an hour next to a guy with a serious B.O. problem (I’ll leave this for another libbie ;P). Kids will have to be taught how to make an accident look like it's the other guy’s fault EVEN THOUGH it’s actually his own fault... Knowing moroor* officers is essential here...
What’s that son? You want to be a moqawil*** when you grow up and get loads of Indians cheap and don’t know where to put them? Easy... Learn from that dumbass that put 200 odd HUMAN BEINGS and stuck them in a building that cant take more than 15 and -get this- it's made of WOOD, fucking blaiwit****! Problem solved... till a disaster occurs and you get your ass harassed by human rights activists... Oh yeah and eventually the government AFTER they have covered your sorry ass up and people KNOW that they have been covering your shitty ass due to 1) Corruption, 2) Bribery or 3) Parternship!
Our kids are our future... And judging from the looks of the primary school children, I feel nothing but dread from trying to imagine how these morons are going to take over the country from us... Let’s just kill the dumb ones and leave the intelligent! But… Then again, the population of Bahrain will dwindle down to like, what, 237 only? SWEET!
Now, where on God's green earth is that baseball bat? I am afraid that the Customs Department saw that article and decided to BAN EVERY SINGLE BASEBALL BAT that is about to enter Bahrain! Fucking cheap-ass labor. And they say poor Indians or Bangalis***** are cheap labor. The government employees are "cheap" labour, cheap in quality, that is. Because they tend to punish ALL for a fuckup of one person whom they originally backed up! What gives?
* Traffic Police
** Water Garden in Salmaniya
*** Contractor
**** Plywood
***** Bangladeshians
What made me laugh real hard was reading about new curriculums for school students approved by the dinosaurish Ministry of Education in Akhbar-Alkhaleej (credit due to them for publishing hilarious articles!). One of these curriculums is about “Life Skills”. It’s about time you idiots, but why now? And what on earth are you going to teach those students? Life Skills my ass.
Apparently, this will teach them on how to deal with people or situations that arise on a day-to-day basis. You want them to learn about real life situations? Then take them on field trips to service-oriented ministries or departments such as the Traffic Directorate, Immigration & Passports and Health Centers (+ Salmaniya Hospital) etc... There they will learn how to kiss ass to get what they want, otherwise they would rot in long queues until their legs go numb or collapse due to their asses not being able to withstand the pressure of standing for 7 hours. Instead of taking them on field trips to Adhari Park or El7adeeqa Elmaa2eyya** year after year after year, just take them to those ministries and give them real life exercises on how to deal with different situations. And award the ones who achieve their goals with accolades such as “Ass-kisser of the Year” or “Cocksucker of the Month”. I can give you a few suggestions on where to take them and scenarios of how to deal with situations. This will be also dependent on how advanced they will get in these courses. With high performers taken into more blood-boiling pressure-rising employee-slacking government entities.
This will be a sort of a "Bahrain survival guide" right? I mean you could teach kids how to evade doing any work at a workplace and yet still get credit for it... You can learn that from any government sector employee… Even with some "private" sector or "semi-government entities" on how to piss off an honest customer who has a small deposit to make (teacher required: any NBB teller, Fuckers!!!)... That process shouldn’t take more than 5 minutes! Yet somehow, they manage to keep you waiting for an hour next to a guy with a serious B.O. problem (I’ll leave this for another libbie ;P). Kids will have to be taught how to make an accident look like it's the other guy’s fault EVEN THOUGH it’s actually his own fault... Knowing moroor* officers is essential here...
What’s that son? You want to be a moqawil*** when you grow up and get loads of Indians cheap and don’t know where to put them? Easy... Learn from that dumbass that put 200 odd HUMAN BEINGS and stuck them in a building that cant take more than 15 and -get this- it's made of WOOD, fucking blaiwit****! Problem solved... till a disaster occurs and you get your ass harassed by human rights activists... Oh yeah and eventually the government AFTER they have covered your sorry ass up and people KNOW that they have been covering your shitty ass due to 1) Corruption, 2) Bribery or 3) Parternship!
Our kids are our future... And judging from the looks of the primary school children, I feel nothing but dread from trying to imagine how these morons are going to take over the country from us... Let’s just kill the dumb ones and leave the intelligent! But… Then again, the population of Bahrain will dwindle down to like, what, 237 only? SWEET!
Now, where on God's green earth is that baseball bat? I am afraid that the Customs Department saw that article and decided to BAN EVERY SINGLE BASEBALL BAT that is about to enter Bahrain! Fucking cheap-ass labor. And they say poor Indians or Bangalis***** are cheap labor. The government employees are "cheap" labour, cheap in quality, that is. Because they tend to punish ALL for a fuckup of one person whom they originally backed up! What gives?
* Traffic Police
** Water Garden in Salmaniya
*** Contractor
**** Plywood
***** Bangladeshians
posted by LiB Team at 3:23 PM
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